1 00:02:27,640 --> 00:02:30,400 I'm late. 2 00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:37,000 Nooo! 3 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:42,600 - Holy shit... - What the heck, even at Christmas? 4 00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:46,880 I... 5 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:52,200 I Bohemian from Romania, no Bohemian Romanian. 6 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:55,320 "Porcaput" in my... 7 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:01,960 ...in my language it means "Bonu Natalu". 8 00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,000 Here I am. 9 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:13,440 Good evening. 10 00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:15,640 Excuse me. 11 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:17,800 Permit. 12 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:22,520 Here, I have to do Saint Joseph. I'm ready. 13 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:29,920 Accountant Colombo, where he holidays of Christmas? Are you staying in Busto? 14 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:33,480 No bust and garter belt, surveyor! 15 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:38,240 - I'm leaving for Aspen tomorrow. - What is it, a medicine? 16 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:42,240 It's a mega-suppository. She's an ass! 17 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:46,040 - Aspen is in America, in Colorado. - How beautiful! 18 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:50,040 I'm taking my daughter there. My wife and I are separated. 19 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:54,000 I'm separated too, I'm doing the paperwork. 20 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:59,280 After 20 years of marriage, my husband he ran off with a stripper. 21 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:03,640 - If you see how vulgar it is, she has huge breasts! - Huge? 22 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,240 The Madonna... 23 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:10,440 So shall we give him this? 24 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:14,200 - Are you sure? - And play! 25 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:20,720 - Shot at the top corner! - I'd give you a shot! 26 00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:24,520 - Remo, what an ass you have! - Which ass? 27 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:28,640 Fabio, tell them who they're playing with. I am like Pelé, Ribot, Tomba... 28 00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:31,520 ...like Brunello di Montalcino. 29 00:04:31,760 --> 00:04:35,960 - Let's have a rematch. - With those loser faces? 30 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:39,400 Better try with the "scratch card". 31 00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:44,720 - [in Sardinian] I have to go home. - And when will you arrive in Olbia? 32 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:49,120 Talk to the founding members, what is this confidence? 33 00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:51,760 Spartacus rebel! 34 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:56,600 But Mr. Proietti, it's Christmas. I am 11.30am and midnight are waiting for me. 35 00:04:56,840 --> 00:05:00,120 - Who cares! - Who are you, baby Jesus? 36 00:05:00,840 --> 00:05:05,440 Like 11:30? But why do I frequent you? 37 00:05:05,640 --> 00:05:10,760 It's Christmas and I'm here playing Gin, my wife kills me! 38 00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:14,600 What do you care? She will eat the panettone alone. 39 00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:18,880 - She's American, she doesn't even play bingo. - And then she's used to it. 40 00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:24,800 The wedding day was waiting for you at church and you were playing poker. 41 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:29,120 With Paolone... good times when he was around! 42 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,280 I ruined it. 43 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:36,440 For me it's like a holy card, like Saint Anthony. I miss you! 44 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:40,840 - This idiot ran away to America. - Call him stupid! 45 00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:45,040 It took away 30 billion to the father-in-law... 46 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:48,800 ...and now he has a mansion in Tucson. Good evening. 47 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:52,160 - [all] Hello. - And now what do I tell my wife? 48 00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:55,840 - [in chorus] Merry Christmas. - Will you like it? 49 00:05:56,360 --> 00:06:00,320 - I don't want to see you anymore! - But how, darling... 50 00:06:00,520 --> 00:06:03,480 - Fuck you! - Kelly, please... 51 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:08,640 - Get away from this house! - I had an accident, my arm... 52 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:12,160 What manners! We're not in Tor Pagnotta. 53 00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:16,400 We are in Vigna Clara, the Beverly Hills of Rome. Kelly! 54 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:21,120 - Doctor, what are you doing? - Santa Claus, mind your own business! 55 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:25,840 How dare you? I'm Luraschi, I'm giving the kids a surprise. 56 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:30,440 - What a bunch of rude people! - Rude people? Kelly, open up. 57 00:06:31,680 --> 00:06:37,640 - Children, Santa Claus has arrived! - Long live Santa Claus! 58 00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:42,440 Stoned, It's not Santa Claus, it's Dad! 59 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:46,320 - It's dad! - No! 60 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:58,160 - How the hell do you drive? - Download. 61 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:03,120 - You can't stop here. - I'll take them and come back. 62 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:06,920 They are terminally ill, they make the journey of hope. 63 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:10,720 - With windsurfing? - Let them play one last time. 64 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:14,240 Will they come back? Maybe! Thank you, very kind. 65 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:17,640 If this time dad it makes me miss the plane, I cancel it. 66 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:20,840 Understood why I couldn't live with him? 67 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:25,440 He's boring, stingy, unbearable... he's an idiot. 68 00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:28,920 - Here I am! - We said 8:15! 69 00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:32,400 Yes, but there was fog in Milan. Understood? 70 00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:35,680 - Little one... - Don't call me little girl! 71 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:39,080 - Mrs Colombo... - Don't call me so, I get hives. 72 00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:43,120 Colombo is a surname, not a virus! Let's go. 73 00:07:43,360 --> 00:07:47,880 - The keys to my house. - Thank you. - But what are you doing in Rome alone? 74 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:50,920 - I can't come. - Why? Listen to the program. 75 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:54,880 We arrive in Mombasa in the afternoon we head towards Malindi, 76 00:07:54,960 --> 00:08:00,480 where in the evening we get walled up alive inside the casino for 10 days. 77 00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:04,760 - It's useless, I can't. - Do as you like. 78 00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:08,200 I'm not coming, but we're in company. The password is... 79 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:11,720 - [speaks in French] - Okay! - Hold this. 80 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:15,040 I'm going to the tobacconist, see you at check-in. 81 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:19,080 - Do you have tickets? - Here they are. 82 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,120 - And the CartaSì? - No. 83 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:24,760 - And the dollars? - Yes. 84 00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:29,560 Daddy's full as an egg, he has a roll of dollars like this. 85 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:32,600 [softly] I hid them. 86 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:35,840 - And the passport? - There he is. 87 00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:40,800 Who did you take me for, for a Zulu? 88 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:49,680 No, I am Neapolitan and in my "Zulu" language do you know what that means? 89 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:52,840 Asshole! Look, I'm Neapolitan too. 90 00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,600 Hold up. 91 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:59,440 Youngsters, Serie B, 92 00:08:59,680 --> 00:09:02,480 like an ass hole. 93 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:06,320 Who wants to participate, take out 1,250 lire. 94 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:12,040 - Come on, you still have time, go! - And that's it! 95 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,000 I have to catch up with Kelly. 96 00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:20,600 Tomorrow I'll bring you a bouquet of roses and I swear I won't do it again. 97 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:24,880 - Liar. - Exactly, but she believes it and collapses. 98 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:28,840 So much so, without me, where is he going? 99 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:32,000 At international departures. 100 00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,440 Kelly! 101 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:43,120 - What are you doing? - I'm leaving. - And where are you going? 102 00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:47,400 - In Aspen. - To do what? - To visit my sister. 103 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,640 - And me? - I am not interested. - But then you'll come back? 104 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:54,880 Maybe you didn't understand, I'm leaving. 105 00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:58,680 Nothing exists between you and me anymore, it's over. 106 00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:02,960 You're right, I was wrong, I'm a worm, a scoundrel, 107 00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:07,160 but I swear to you that I will change, I'll stop playing. 108 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:20,920 And what he bought, the San Remo casino? 109 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:27,520 Kelly, no! 110 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:52,040 How tall we are! You can see the little houses... 111 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:55,040 ...and the machines that do that. 112 00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:04,440 - Carina, what are you reading? - "Meaning what". 113 00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:07,520 - What do you read? - "Meaning what". 114 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:10,920 I understood, but what is the name of the newspaper? 115 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:14,400 - It's called "That is". - Ah, it's called "Cioè"! 116 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:16,480 It is true. 117 00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:19,400 At your age I read certain books... 118 00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:23,440 "Heart", "Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea"... 119 00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:26,080 What a drag! 120 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:29,480 - That stuff "bounces off me". - That? 121 00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:32,440 I don't like. 122 00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:38,240 Look, look dad... how are you going at school? 123 00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:40,880 - By scooter. - How? 124 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:44,440 I was joking. I go "scrausa". 125 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:48,320 - What does that mean? - That I go so-so. 126 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,520 - What are you doing here? Are you crazy? - Yes, I'm crazy. 127 00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:03,440 - I'm crazy about you, don't leave me! - Go away or I'll call a stewardess. 128 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,680 And call her! What are you doing, are you making me get off? 129 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:10,560 I don't want to see you anymore, go away! 130 00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:14,400 - Love, forgive me. - How exhausting! 131 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:18,320 It's true, it's my fault. 132 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:22,480 I acted like an idiot, I told you a lot of lies, 133 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:27,080 I left you alone for ours anniversary, Christmas, New Year... 134 00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:29,440 At Easter... 135 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:34,400 "Easter with whoever you want", the saying goes. 136 00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,160 It's useless, Remo. 137 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:45,160 Kelly, for me the game is one drug, he's stronger than me. 138 00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:50,400 But now I want to change, I want to live a normal life. 139 00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:53,280 I swear to you that... 140 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:59,240 - But are you listening to me? - I took a sleeping pill. 141 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:02,440 Now let me sleep. 142 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:07,080 But how, Do you leave me while I'm swearing? 143 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:17,080 - I've got her under the whip! - [speaks in a foreign language] 144 00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:21,000 Madonna, what anxiety! 145 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:24,680 But where am I going? 146 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,360 What do I do now? Shall I go back there? 147 00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,920 Tell me why we're going to Colorado, 148 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:39,480 that we have in Ponte di Legno a very "Colorado" apartment? 149 00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:42,680 - You want to put Wooden Bridge with Aspen? - Certain. 150 00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:48,320 - In Ponte di Legno there are mountains, the snow... - But Dylan isn't there. 151 00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:51,720 - Bob Dylan? - No, this one. 152 00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:55,800 - Is he Bob Dylan's son? - No, Dylan by name. 153 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:59,560 - Is he a friend of yours? - Let's hope! Look how "good" it is. 154 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:02,960 - It's not called good. - Read here. 155 00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:07,200 "Dylan has a house in Aspen where he spends the Christmas holidays." 156 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:11,280 - Do you understand the "magician"? - How do you speak? You look like Alberto Sordi! 157 00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:14,320 You have to speak Lombard like dad. 158 00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:20,160 "We go Aspen to meet Dylan." 159 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:25,960 We have to travel 12,000 km to go and meet an artichoke? 160 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:31,280 "Artichoke" the protagonist from "The Boys from Beverly Hills"? 161 00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:33,640 Artichoke. 162 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:45,000 I was wrong to fast! The turbulence... 163 00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:50,240 What are you doing, asshole? 164 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:31,160 Doorman, open the door! What a back pain! 165 00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:35,600 I have to tell you something, Ponte di Legno will be less chic, 166 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:39,640 but I'll get there in an hour, like Verona-Milan. 167 00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:44,520 I'm going for a walk in town, you take a "nap". 168 00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:49,080 - What? Ah, a nap! - We will see each other later. 169 00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:52,800 - Where are you going? - Welcome, Mr Colombo. 170 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:56,600 Mrs. Pivetti, how are you? Much pleasure. 171 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:01,680 But... 172 00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:19,760 Concierge? This is room 124. There was an exchange of suitcases. 173 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,680 Holy shit! 174 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:36,360 My daughter at 14 years old do you wear this stuff? 175 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:41,120 But that's not possible! We see. 176 00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,680 A bra! Another! 177 00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:47,320 Underwear! 178 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:51,480 Underwear! And these? 179 00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:56,440 Mrs. Proietti, there is a gentleman here who says he is her husband. 180 00:17:56,640 --> 00:18:00,320 I'm her husband! 1989, church of San Pancrazio. 181 00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:03,760 300 guests, refreshments at Vanni. Kelly, it's me! 182 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:08,560 Now he's crossed the line! Don't let him go up. 183 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:12,080 Tell him not to follow me and go to hell! 184 00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:20,120 - So I go up? - Actually the lady said... 185 00:18:20,320 --> 00:18:25,120 ...not to follow her and go to hell. What a guy! 186 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:29,160 What do you say? But get your teeth done! 187 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:34,960 It's not possible, but where does he buy all these things? 188 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:39,760 I get nervous, maybe it's the Aspen air. 189 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:44,920 Luckily, I found valerian. 190 00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:49,000 It's valerian for school. 191 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,120 I'll take three. 192 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:54,480 Tranquilizers. 193 00:18:56,360 --> 00:19:00,280 "Babynon, birth control dragees." It's the pill. 194 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:03,480 But... 195 00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:08,280 Holy shit! My daughter is on the pill! Martha! 196 00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:11,600 The backpack will be full of condoms! 197 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:17,080 But then it was a nightmare. 198 00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:20,640 My little girl is my little girl. 199 00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:24,400 The teddy bear, the camera, the diary... 200 00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:30,200 Kelly? 201 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:36,200 Where are you, Kelly? 202 00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:40,320 Kelly, love? "Pucci pucci..." 203 00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:43,880 - There's your little darling. - Yes? 204 00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:47,640 - Sorry, I got the wrong room. - Sin. 205 00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:49,280 Too bad yes! 206 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:52,600 I'm looking for my wife and I find a fagot with a moustache! 207 00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:57,520 Why do you have shaved legs? Kelly? 208 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:01,480 "Beverly Hills 90210." 209 00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:04,720 This is my old number of Busto. 210 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:08,800 "How cool! How good of you!" 211 00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:15,880 "I love you! I love you! I'd fuck you!" 212 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:19,920 "In Aspen he will make you!" 213 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:23,680 But is she crazy? She's crazy! 214 00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:25,560 Martha! 215 00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:31,680 Marta, your dad is coming! He's in danger! 216 00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:38,280 But that's Kelly's. 217 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,720 Love! 218 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,000 Marta, your dad is here! 219 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:54,240 Away with her! 220 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:58,160 - Don't kiss her, coward! - Dad, what are you doing? 221 00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:01,720 - Who is he? - I'm the clerk. 222 00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:04,560 - I was trying on a jacket for you. - No jacket... 223 00:21:04,760 --> 00:21:08,800 - What a shame, you're pathetic! - You shut up! 224 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:12,680 - Whose are these? - I do not know. 225 00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:17,360 - And whose are these? - I don't know, leave me alone! 226 00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:22,520 You hid it from your father that you take the pill! 227 00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:25,160 - Dad! - What is it? 228 00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,320 You have to take the pill yourself. 229 00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:31,160 About the recipe It says Kelly Proietti. 230 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,760 - Yes, it says Mrs. Proietti. - Bravo. 231 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:38,600 - But then the pills aren't yours! - No. 232 00:21:38,920 --> 00:21:42,080 - And not even slutty panties! - Bravo. 233 00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:45,240 - The jacket is yours though. - Yes. - And he's not Dylan. - No. 234 00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:48,160 But I took 4 pills! 235 00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:50,720 At that time... 236 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:56,600 her dad takes it. 237 00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:07,200 - [door opening] - Here's Kelly. 238 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,160 [Lorenzo sings] 239 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,440 But whose room is this? 240 00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:16,120 [sings] 241 00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,560 [sings] 242 00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:31,320 [sings] 243 00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:52,280 [sings] 244 00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:13,320 Don't worry, I can explain everything to you. 245 00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:17,960 - Taken! - Aah! 246 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:21,680 - So he'll give it to me! - And then I'll jerk you off! 247 00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:26,680 - I got it! - Don't do that! Don't shoot! 248 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,960 These are delicate parts, stop! 249 00:23:30,360 --> 00:23:33,880 - I have to wash my hands, how disgusting! - Let me explain. 250 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:37,840 - No, I wash them like this. - This is a misunderstanding. 251 00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:40,960 I wanted to surprise my wife. 252 00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:43,080 How funny! 253 00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,800 I thought it was the room of my wife. 254 00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:50,360 - But do me a favor! At times I found him again... - Eh, no! 255 00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:52,520 - Well yes! - Oh, no! 256 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,760 - Get dressed! - No, I'll wear it like this! - And that's how I fit in! 257 00:23:56,960 --> 00:24:00,560 - Look how pale he's become. - But do me a favor! 258 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,920 If you know what's happening to me, I have some dicks... 259 00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:06,280 I heard. 260 00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,760 - I argued with my wife. - I am sorry. 261 00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,760 But I'm not his stopgap! 262 00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:20,880 I love her. 263 00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:24,400 Don't talk nonsense. 264 00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,560 I love her. 265 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:30,680 - But it's not possible! - I'm madly in love. 266 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:34,400 But we just met and then I'm married. 267 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,880 Not about you, about my wife! Excuse me. 268 00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:42,240 - What's on his mind, an armpit? - She has a buckskin between her legs. 269 00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,200 And you the rag of a Pole! 270 00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:48,960 I left suddenly to follow her, like this. 271 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:52,080 - What, naked? - But no, with those. 272 00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:55,240 - With clothes? - Yes, but I don't have a penny. 273 00:24:55,480 --> 00:24:59,040 - Goodbye then. - Can you give me a hand? - In what sense? 274 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:01,200 What does it have to do with it? 275 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:08,160 Kelly! 276 00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:12,040 - HI. - Remo, it's not possible! 277 00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:16,040 - Beautiful Aspen, great skiing! - If you have never skied in your life. 278 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:19,320 I have changed. Shall we go down together? 279 00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:22,480 - Look, it's dangerous. - I'll follow you. 280 00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:25,640 - Ok, too bad for you. - Let's go. 281 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,280 Go calmly, I have no problems. 282 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:35,400 Here you are. Love, I'm coming! 283 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:45,640 Look how I come down. 284 00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:47,920 And no! 285 00:25:50,360 --> 00:25:53,480 Remo, watch out! Stop! 286 00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:56,960 - Stop, Remo! - Yes, love, I'll stop now. 287 00:25:57,200 --> 00:26:01,960 No, I'm not stopping. I'm not stopping! 288 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,080 Watch out, you'll break your head! 289 00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:07,360 As? 290 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:12,720 More and more difficult! 291 00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,600 Sorry... permission! Sign? 292 00:26:17,360 --> 00:26:19,440 Taken! 293 00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:22,000 No, Remo! 294 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:24,600 Shit! 295 00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:31,320 I don't feel well at all. 296 00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:39,000 He's lucky, nothing is broken. 297 00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:42,640 These days I'm so unlucky, 298 00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:45,880 that if I cross the street to a black cat, he scratches himself! 299 00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:51,400 - Excuse me, I'm looking for my husband, Proietti. - I think it's over there. 300 00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,720 Thank you. 301 00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:57,160 Excuse me for a moment. 302 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:00,160 [moans] 303 00:27:00,560 --> 00:27:03,080 What a pain! 304 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:07,400 - Remo, don't get excited. - I feel terrible. 305 00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:10,840 What will it be? I'm starting to sweat. 306 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:15,600 - Sorry, I didn't mean to. - You almost killed me. 307 00:27:16,960 --> 00:27:19,880 You knew it was dangerous. 308 00:27:20,120 --> 00:27:24,880 - But it ended well, luckily. - What good? It's a catastrophe! 309 00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:30,320 Please don't leave me alone in this bed of pain! 310 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,080 - Relax. - Squeeze my hand tighter. 311 00:27:34,280 --> 00:27:37,400 - I'm afraid of hurting you. - And tighten! - As? 312 00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:40,640 Yes. And now do something else for me. 313 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,960 - What? - Give me a little caress. 314 00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,520 - What are you doing? - I take care of myself. 315 00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:00,400 - No, but what are you doing? - I love you! 316 00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:02,600 No, Remo... 317 00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:17,240 - What are you doing to me? - This is nothing. 318 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:20,760 Tonight at the hotel you'll see what I do to you! 319 00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:24,560 - You will see the whale's tooth! - Exaggerated. 320 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:28,600 What do you want, are you jealous? You even have balls in casts! 321 00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:35,160 All girls my age they have a diary. 322 00:28:35,360 --> 00:28:39,080 And they all write: "How good is that, I would do it"? 323 00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:44,400 - Dad, it's just a figure of speech. - It's a way to get pregnant. 324 00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:47,600 - You're crazy. - You're crazy! 325 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:50,560 - You are 14 years old. - Almost 15! 326 00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:57,160 It's normal for a father to get nervous and be apprehensive. 327 00:28:57,360 --> 00:28:59,760 You are too much! 328 00:28:59,960 --> 00:29:05,240 I get excited like when I go to see Milan at San Siro. 329 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:10,400 Try to understand, mine is head stuff. 330 00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:16,040 - When I see Dylan it's like... - Cheese on macaroni! 331 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:19,480 Okay, but... What are you looking at? 332 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:26,280 - Dad, I feel bad. - It's the air. 333 00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:29,280 We're too tall here. Breathe. 334 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:32,000 Merry Christmas! 335 00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:36,400 Dad, Dylan's here! 336 00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,120 How lucky! 337 00:29:41,320 --> 00:29:45,720 - How good is that! - Give me your hand. 338 00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:48,680 - Let's go. - I love you! 339 00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:53,560 - Where are you going? Don't pull! - Come on! 340 00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,680 I feel like going wild tonight. 341 00:29:56,880 --> 00:30:00,840 - You can't do that here. - Do you realize he's there? 342 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:05,080 - But who, Berlusconi? - No, Dylan! I'm here specifically to see it. 343 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:08,520 - Just to see him? - Yes. Let's go to the disco! 344 00:30:08,760 --> 00:30:11,880 No disco, let's go to bed! 345 00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:14,800 Now I'll talk. 346 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,840 You've been worrying me for 24 hours! 347 00:30:18,040 --> 00:30:21,120 I'll call mom and come home. I'm giving up on you! 348 00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:23,240 - No. - Yes! 349 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:27,000 Do you respond like this to your father? Do you raise your head? 350 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:30,640 Don't raise your head at this hour! It's late! It's... 351 00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:34,600 - Okay, let's go to the disco. - Thank you! 352 00:30:34,840 --> 00:30:37,760 [dance music] 353 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:52,160 Martha... 354 00:30:57,520 --> 00:31:01,480 Martha! Have you seen Dylan, now let's go home. 355 00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:05,920 Look at him, he's cuter in person. My love! 356 00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:13,440 But how about "my love"? Conduct, we are in a public place! 357 00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:17,800 Have you seen what eyes he has? How good is that! 358 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:20,640 How good is it? 359 00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:26,760 No, how good! 360 00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:30,080 See who he would be? Not stupid! 361 00:31:30,280 --> 00:31:33,680 - Don't even say that as a joke! - No, of course. 362 00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:38,520 And what those are "Beverly Hills Pussies"! 363 00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:43,120 - Oh, yes? Now you see! - Where are you going? Come here! 364 00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:40,400 - Look at that little girl! - She's fabulous. 365 00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:43,360 - But he's 14 years old! - Precisely. 366 00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:47,000 - Are you here too? - You know, I made peace with my wife... 367 00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:50,720 - Love, come! - And now I'm celebrating. 368 00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:53,880 - With my money? - How material you are! 369 00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:58,000 What are you doing here? Do you point at little girls? 370 00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:02,200 - All sluts. - Like "all sluts"? 371 00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,720 - Look over there! - My little sparrow is 14 years old. 372 00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:08,800 Little Sparrow, 14 years old, slut. 373 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:12,200 You know, I'm an apprehensive father and so... 374 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:16,080 Today these little girls are terrible, they combine certain things... 375 00:33:16,280 --> 00:33:20,520 - Why, does she have a daughter too? - No, I see friends' daughters. 376 00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:23,840 There is a certain Monica, 13 years old, who looks like a porn star. 377 00:33:24,040 --> 00:33:28,640 He dresses like a viados, where it picks it picks. It does everything! 378 00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:34,040 With miniskirts, bras, breasts sure that if you put it in your mouth... 379 00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:37,040 - She worries me. - It's just for chatting. 380 00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:40,640 - Enough! - If you have a slutty daughter, have some chamomile tea. 381 00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:43,840 Marta, stop dancing! 382 00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:46,360 Marta! 383 00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:49,800 Marta! 384 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:53,040 Permission, make way! 385 00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,720 Do you want to get up? Get up! 386 00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:04,120 - Let's go home. - Go away! 387 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:10,920 - Come on, let's go home. - Get up, he's looking at me! 388 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,120 - Let's go. - No, I'm not coming! 389 00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:21,920 - I'll take you away with a spanking! - No, put me down! 390 00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:34,600 391 00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:38,000 My head is spinning, I drank too much. 392 00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:45,280 Love, you remember our wedding night? 393 00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:49,240 There was the moon high in the sky, the singing of crickets... 394 00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:52,280 "Cri cri, cri cri..." 395 00:34:52,720 --> 00:34:55,520 What a romantic night. 396 00:34:55,720 --> 00:34:58,080 A "fuck"... 397 00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:01,120 Oh God, the whole room is moving. 398 00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:05,920 Don't worry, Now I'll pin you to the mattress! 399 00:35:07,720 --> 00:35:13,160 - I'm tired, it's midnight. - I'm at noon instead! 400 00:35:13,760 --> 00:35:16,640 Remo, let me sleep. 401 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:20,280 Please, let's postpone it until tomorrow. 402 00:35:20,480 --> 00:35:24,440 - Hi love. - And he says "hello love"! 403 00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:30,200 She drinks Chianti, this idiot. You're American, you drink Coca-Cola! 404 00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:37,720 - Do you want? - A chamomile, thank you. 405 00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,320 - Are you nervous? - Paolone! 406 00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:44,600 HI! What are you doing around here? 407 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:49,080 - I'm on holiday with my wife. - That American "mouse"? 408 00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:52,520 How classy in offering compliments! 409 00:35:52,720 --> 00:35:56,040 - And he still tolerates you? - I've changed. 410 00:35:56,240 --> 00:35:59,200 - I drink chamomile, I don't play anymore... - Too bad. 411 00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:05,200 We were playing a game with Americans... serious stuff! 412 00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:07,920 - Poker? - Yes, with all the cards. 413 00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:12,080 - It's more complicated. - I am a champion. - Then come. 414 00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:16,480 - I don't play anymore. - You made a vow to the Madonna? - Yes, of Divine Love. 415 00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:21,680 I'm in the next room. I'm going, I'm destroying them! 416 00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:25,080 She's a wimp, Who is he playing with? 417 00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:27,960 With the blind girl from Sorrento? 418 00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:32,240 - Full of three, the pot goes to me! - Wrong. 419 00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:36,800 Poker of four, and I'll take the whole plate! 420 00:36:37,240 --> 00:36:41,600 Tonight the wheel turned and I punished you. 421 00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:46,640 - Another round? - No, that's enough for tonight. 422 00:36:46,840 --> 00:36:50,240 - But I lose a sum. - If anything tomorrow. 423 00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:53,280 Okay, see you tomorrow. 424 00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,920 Shall the two of us move forward? 425 00:36:57,720 --> 00:37:01,320 - You owe me 700. - Mila. 426 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:04,720 - Dollars. - Ah, dollars. 427 00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:11,200 How much is it in pounds? 428 00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:15,640 One billion and 200. 429 00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:21,800 Like an apartment in the Flaminio area! 430 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:27,480 I feel bad. My legs are shaking. 431 00:37:27,560 --> 00:37:31,040 - It's the high ground, then it passes. - Then it passes. 432 00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:35,760 Rather, how do you pay me? Check or cash? 433 00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:39,880 What do I know? Let me think about it. 434 00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:45,600 Take your time, I'll see you tomorrow and settle it. 435 00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:48,960 Let's adjust... One billion and 200... 436 00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:52,000 'These dicks! 437 00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:55,800 Ready? But where are you? 438 00:37:56,160 --> 00:38:00,040 Where the hell are you? In Colorado? To do what? 439 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:05,360 Nothing, I'll tell you when I get back. I need money. 440 00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:09,200 Remo, it was always released on the 24th, they're smashing us! 441 00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:15,360 - Nice company we made! - Go to that idiot Paolone. 442 00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:18,520 Of course, that would be really lucky. 443 00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:21,080 Bye, bye... 444 00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:29,440 But look at the mess! 445 00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:34,760 Hi love. 446 00:38:38,240 --> 00:38:42,200 - Where were we last night? - Come on, Kelly... 447 00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:45,200 Be quiet, now's not the time. 448 00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:53,120 Come on, show me the whale tooth. 449 00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:57,400 Don't insist, I'm not a kid anymore. 450 00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:00,320 I feel weak, debilitated, 451 00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:04,440 and then here it's too high for me, My head is spinning even in Velletri! 452 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:08,360 But how, don't you remember that time in Cervinia? 453 00:39:09,160 --> 00:39:13,120 - You were the bomb. - The years pass. 454 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:16,880 Inside this trunk, the gear is rusty. 455 00:39:17,080 --> 00:39:19,440 I have colitis, the beginning of arthrosis, 456 00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:23,800 not to mention the liver... I should stay in Chianciano! 457 00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,640 And I have the beginnings of calluses. 458 00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:31,080 And thanks to the chilli pepper in this fucking America, 459 00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:33,720 there is something monstrous underneath. 460 00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:37,160 - Remo! - It's sad, but it's the truth. 461 00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:41,480 I look like a thoroughbred, but I'm a tired horse. 462 00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:54,960 [Lorenzo] Dad follows you, so he protects you. 463 00:39:55,520 --> 00:40:00,080 Come to your dad, give me a kiss! 464 00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:05,080 - Dad, what anguish! - You never take another step without me. 465 00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:10,240 - And give me a break. - No, I'm not giving up on you. Understood? 466 00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:13,240 I won't give up on you! 467 00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:16,440 - I took a stake. - Do you know who you are? 468 00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:19,520 I'm an asshole. 469 00:40:19,720 --> 00:40:24,000 But a real asshole. You came across the asshole. 470 00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:28,000 Marta, where did you go? 471 00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:31,200 I'm looking for my daughter. 472 00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:37,400 - Excuse me, to go to Aspen? - Follow the path. 473 00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:41,320 - Thank you. - There's Dylan at the window! 474 00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:45,560 I only have room for one. But what happens? 475 00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:50,280 - Look, there's Dylan! - The one in Beverly Hills? 476 00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:56,480 - Yes, he lives here. - And they do come into the house if we call him? 477 00:40:56,680 --> 00:40:59,240 Dylan! Dylan! 478 00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:06,000 - Are you a fan too? - Passionate. 479 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:10,680 It's so good I would do it! When will they let us in? 480 00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:16,360 - I don't know, it could be 2 days or a week. - A week? 481 00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:20,320 [Lorenzo] I have to find an idea to enter immediately. 482 00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:25,680 I'm happy to be here, I hope to spend beautiful days. 483 00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:28,920 I send a kiss to my friends. 484 00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:33,280 - Well, we're done. - Thank you. - Okay, break. 485 00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:36,360 Stop! A moment for the photo. 486 00:41:36,560 --> 00:41:39,920 Give a nice smile. 487 00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:47,680 - And who are you? - A photographer, I have to take photos. 488 00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:51,520 - I didn't call any photographer. - Why not? 489 00:41:51,720 --> 00:41:54,600 - Get lost. - I'm a fan. 490 00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:59,080 - At your age? - I did 12 hours by plane to get here. 491 00:41:59,280 --> 00:42:02,200 - I'm a fan of his. - Walk. 492 00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:05,960 - It's for my daughter. - Move! 493 00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:11,040 Ok, I'll take care of it. Come, let's go over there. 494 00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:16,600 Don't worry about your daughter, I am responsible. 495 00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:20,040 At my age I don't act like a fool with a little girl. 496 00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:23,240 She's the one who wants to be silly with you. 497 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:26,640 I understand. Is that how she is, cute? 498 00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:31,760 Yes. But I'm the dad, I'm a little biased. 499 00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:36,320 However, I'm already busy, I'm very engaged. 500 00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:39,920 I know, but she wrote in her diary: 501 00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:43,240 "It will be yours, no matter what the cost!" 502 00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:47,480 - Well, she's nice. - No, he's out of his mind! 503 00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:51,080 They often do this. I'll show you. 504 00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:54,120 Wait while I take a photo. 505 00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:03,600 Here are the letters I receive every month from all over the world. 506 00:43:03,800 --> 00:43:07,640 This girl writes to me from Madrid, Her name is Carmen. 507 00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:11,840 She says if I don't marry her, he cuts his wrists. 508 00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:14,760 - Age? - 11 years. 509 00:43:14,960 --> 00:43:19,160 - A bitch prodigy! - What? - Nothing. 510 00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:22,160 If I took them all seriously, 511 00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:25,320 I should go to bed with 10 million girls. 512 00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:31,080 Sorry, but it's 9,999,999 to me I don't give a damn. 513 00:43:32,240 --> 00:43:35,200 Just don't do mine. 514 00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:38,720 - You're nice. - You too. 515 00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:43,520 If I were 12 years old, I would write to you too. In fact, I'm writing to you. 516 00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:46,520 - What are you doing? - An autograph. 517 00:43:46,720 --> 00:43:49,880 For Martha, greetings, kisses and hugs... 518 00:43:50,080 --> 00:43:54,000 - The photo is small, it doesn't fit everything. - Sympathy... 519 00:43:54,200 --> 00:43:56,920 Well, whatever you want. 520 00:43:57,120 --> 00:44:00,240 "Luke Perry". Here you go! Thank you. 521 00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:04,560 - I'll make a great impression. - Okay. - "For Marta". 522 00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:08,880 - [scream] - But what's happening? Come with me. 523 00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:12,240 - Leave me! - Give me back the watch! 524 00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:15,600 - What happens? - I met her last night. 525 00:44:15,840 --> 00:44:19,560 I brought her here and this morning I caught her stealing. 526 00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:24,080 Bad temper, sounds like my wife. 527 00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:29,400 Animal! Do you hit a woman? Go away! 528 00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:34,040 Yes, I'm leaving, I'm sick of little girls. 529 00:44:34,240 --> 00:44:36,560 - Hey! - How are you? 530 00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:39,400 - Is he sick? - She just fainted. 531 00:44:39,480 --> 00:44:43,520 To be on the safe side, it's best to bring it to the hospital, but I can't. 532 00:44:43,600 --> 00:44:49,520 - If those girls see me go out, they block me. - I'll carry it. 533 00:44:54,520 --> 00:45:00,000 - Where are they? - I'm taking her to the city, to Aspen. 534 00:45:00,680 --> 00:45:03,800 He punched me that son of a bitch! 535 00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:07,520 I have nothing to do with it. I'm taking her to the hospital. 536 00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:10,680 You go! But who are you? 537 00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:12,720 I? 538 00:45:13,320 --> 00:45:17,360 Nice to meet you, Lorenzo Colombo. I'm the dad of a fan. 539 00:45:17,560 --> 00:45:22,800 - Very good friend of Luke. - Where are we here? - I do not know. 540 00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:27,000 I come from the lower Milanese area, Bust, Cologno, Cinisello Balsamo... 541 00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:29,800 However we are close to Aspen. 542 00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:33,240 Turn right, let's go to Roger's bistro. 543 00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:37,400 No, I'm going straight, I'm not a taxi! 544 00:45:39,160 --> 00:45:43,280 - What did you say? - What a ride. 545 00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:46,600 Bad character, like my wife, 546 00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:50,840 like my daughter, like the gorilla... shitty character. 547 00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:58,200 They didn't even give me time to change me, those bastards. 548 00:45:58,280 --> 00:46:02,120 Look ahead! You're going off track, asshole! 549 00:46:02,360 --> 00:46:05,520 I? Now it makes me angry! 550 00:46:05,720 --> 00:46:10,840 It's his fault, he shows me the "pears" and he is without underwear. 551 00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:16,160 I am an accountant from Busto, I'm not Mel Gibson. 552 00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:19,120 Wait, I can't see. 553 00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:59,120 - Hello, "chicken". Did you sleep well? - You woke up early. 554 00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:02,320 I was so excited that I didn't sleep. 555 00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:07,360 - So, how do you pay me? - Wait a minute... 556 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:11,000 I'm not coming on holiday with a billion in his pocket. 557 00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:15,760 - And how are you at the bank? - Like the "Lady in Red". 558 00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:20,680 - Ah, you're at zero! - [Kelly] Hi, Remo. 559 00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:23,480 Hi love. 560 00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:40,080 What's a "pussy" like that doing? with a poor guy like you? 561 00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:45,040 - Leave my wife alone, she knows nothing. - Why? 562 00:47:45,240 --> 00:47:49,280 Maybe your lady is the solution to our problems. 563 00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:52,440 No, she doesn't have a penny either. 564 00:47:57,240 --> 00:48:02,640 Yes, but it has two "boobs" that could be listed on the stock exchange! 565 00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:06,760 - How dare you? - Remo! - Yes? 566 00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:10,520 - Do you have a billion and 200 million? - No. 567 00:48:12,040 --> 00:48:16,400 If you make me "fuck" your wife, I'll cancel your debt. 568 00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:20,160 - I did not understand. - You understood very well. 569 00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:24,560 What the fuck are you talking about! My wife with you? 570 00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:30,560 - It's a serious business proposition. - No, it's an indecent proposal! 571 00:48:30,960 --> 00:48:35,920 But she didn't mind the idea to fuck Robert Redford. 572 00:48:36,160 --> 00:48:40,880 And you would be Robert Redford? You look more like a trotter! 573 00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:45,040 You know where you need to stand your billion and 200? 574 00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:49,120 In America Gambling debts are paid. 575 00:48:49,320 --> 00:48:52,280 It's no fun sleeping in Sing Sing. 576 00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:56,960 Either you pay the debt with money, or... 577 00:48:57,200 --> 00:49:01,080 Go and die killed, you and Sing Sing! 578 00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:05,800 Darling, let's go to the room and let's go to bed... 579 00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:09,600 Everyone think about fucking! Give me a break! 580 00:49:18,920 --> 00:49:22,640 It was a pleasure meeting you, thanks for the ride. 581 00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:26,760 - This is the luggage. Until we meet again. - Bring it in! 582 00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:30,480 - I'm not his porter! - Don't be rude. 583 00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:33,520 I'm a lady, asshole! 584 00:49:36,360 --> 00:49:39,360 I wear it like this because it weighs. 585 00:49:57,920 --> 00:50:01,800 Lorenzo, meet Roger, the owner of the place. 586 00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:05,520 - Until we meet again. - Hello, Lorenzo. He smokes. 587 00:50:05,720 --> 00:50:08,680 But I have never smoked in my life. 588 00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:12,360 Don't be boring, This herb is great. 589 00:50:12,440 --> 00:50:16,440 I get it, it's like a chamomile, a herbal tea. 590 00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:19,440 Yes, it will calm you down, you'll see. 591 00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:27,160 Smoke it yourself. 592 00:50:33,040 --> 00:50:35,960 Did he put arugula in it? 593 00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:42,840 Smoke it yourself. 594 00:50:47,720 --> 00:50:50,200 [barks] 595 00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:52,760 Let's go. 596 00:50:54,000 --> 00:50:55,960 - HI. - [barks] 597 00:50:56,160 --> 00:50:58,960 Come on, the mud fight begins! 598 00:51:09,160 --> 00:51:11,960 Wide! Let's see! 599 00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:14,440 [strange] 600 00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:19,200 The photo for my daughter! 601 00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,840 Where's Luke's photo? 602 00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:29,440 Here it is! 603 00:51:32,560 --> 00:51:34,440 Finally... 604 00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:38,680 What are you doing, tearing it up for me? Bad cow! 605 00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:41,840 That's a photo of my little girl! 606 00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:47,040 Heard anything? No, don't do that! 607 00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:50,040 Come on, kill him! 608 00:51:50,240 --> 00:51:53,160 Pleasure and violence at the same time. 609 00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:57,400 Leave me alone! 610 00:51:57,600 --> 00:52:02,160 - What "dirtiness"! - Come on! 611 00:52:02,400 --> 00:52:05,400 I feel like I'm a pig. 612 00:52:05,600 --> 00:52:08,080 Stay still! 613 00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:11,120 I can't do it! 614 00:52:13,600 --> 00:52:15,520 I'm drowning! 615 00:52:15,720 --> 00:52:18,720 No, I found a life preserver. 616 00:52:21,240 --> 00:52:24,320 Guys, let's all go down to the valley! 617 00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:28,800 Enough, I'll throw the clothes away! Here you go. 618 00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:30,760 - Drink. - Things? 619 00:52:30,960 --> 00:52:33,840 Drink it will cheer you up! 620 00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:39,120 - I'll help you. - I'm almost done. 621 00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:42,600 I'm crazy! 622 00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:46,760 I took you for a regular one, instead you are a nice "freak"! 623 00:52:46,960 --> 00:52:49,800 Yes, I'm quite a freak! [sings] 624 00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:53,000 Now we'll dive into the valley with these. 625 00:52:53,200 --> 00:52:56,680 - The descent of death! - Yes, of death! 626 00:52:56,920 --> 00:53:01,920 - What is the descent of death? - Not on skis, on those. 627 00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:07,280 - Find something too to put your skis on. - Speak loudly. 628 00:53:07,480 --> 00:53:12,880 My ears are full of frozen arugula. Let's see what's around the corner. 629 00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:18,720 Now let's have fun. Go! 630 00:53:20,800 --> 00:53:22,640 Jane... 631 00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:25,920 I found this. 632 00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:29,680 Fantastic! 633 00:53:29,920 --> 00:53:35,200 At least if I can't stand it, I know where it falls. 634 00:54:02,720 --> 00:54:05,680 [inaudible voices] 635 00:54:05,920 --> 00:54:08,640 [inaudible] 636 00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:17,480 [inaudible] 637 00:54:27,520 --> 00:54:30,360 The crevasse! 638 00:54:30,960 --> 00:54:33,480 The crevasse! 639 00:54:35,520 --> 00:54:38,320 [Marta] Dad, where are you? 640 00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:40,920 Dad! 641 00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:44,040 Where are you? 642 00:54:44,280 --> 00:54:47,000 I'm here, at a bear's house. 643 00:54:47,080 --> 00:54:49,240 [groan] 644 00:54:49,480 --> 00:54:53,120 Stay down, I'm also a fan of Piero Angela. 645 00:54:53,360 --> 00:54:57,400 You ruin my Timberlands. Go away! 646 00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:03,600 [Lorenzo] I'm here! 647 00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:05,560 Aah! 648 00:55:11,200 --> 00:55:15,240 - How did you end up there? - How did I do it? 649 00:55:15,440 --> 00:55:18,240 It's all your Dylan's fault. 650 00:55:18,840 --> 00:55:24,200 First he introduced me to a crazy woman, Jane, then she lent me the jeep... 651 00:55:24,680 --> 00:55:28,120 Dad, have you met Dylan? 652 00:55:31,360 --> 00:55:34,320 Your dad is your dad, right? 653 00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:38,080 Dylan and I are "good and bad". 654 00:55:38,280 --> 00:55:41,400 It's strong, it's like Lipton tea, number one! 655 00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:45,000 You just say it because you want to that you forget it. 656 00:55:45,160 --> 00:55:48,360 So, seen that I have to bring the jeep back to him, 657 00:55:48,440 --> 00:55:51,560 let's go to his house and I present it to you. 658 00:55:51,640 --> 00:55:53,600 - Hurray! - Aah! 659 00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:56,520 - Excuse me. - But she's a little girl. 660 00:55:56,680 --> 00:56:01,360 I can't come dressed like this, I have to wear something nice. 661 00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:07,320 - You're already cute. - At the hotel I have a killer miniskirt. 662 00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:11,480 Let's start again, amazing miniskirt... 663 00:56:11,680 --> 00:56:15,320 - I didn't go there in a miniskirt. - But I'm fine with it. 664 00:56:15,400 --> 00:56:18,640 And then you have to change too, you look like a refugee. 665 00:56:18,720 --> 00:56:22,760 A refugee? I feel like Jovanotti! Look at the holes. 666 00:56:23,560 --> 00:56:26,320 No, you're better. 667 00:56:28,400 --> 00:56:31,160 You're doing me terrible. 668 00:56:31,800 --> 00:56:35,360 Are you leaving? But his wife has booked until the 7th. 669 00:56:35,560 --> 00:56:38,560 - Be a hotel concierge! - In what sense? 670 00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,520 Mind your own business and prepare the bill. 671 00:56:41,720 --> 00:56:46,160 - Ok, here's your passport. - I'll keep this one. 672 00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:51,680 - Why do you keep it? - Because he still has to pay a debt. 673 00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:54,880 - I'll pay. - Very good. 674 00:56:54,960 --> 00:56:58,720 In the meantime I'll keep my passport, so he doesn't run away. 675 00:56:58,920 --> 00:57:03,840 - I'm staying here, I'm doing a fairytale holiday! - Good. 676 00:57:04,080 --> 00:57:08,040 - What do I do with the bill? - Which account? Shut up! 677 00:57:08,240 --> 00:57:12,200 - Wasn't he supposed to leave? - No, I'm staying. 678 00:57:13,480 --> 00:57:16,880 With death in my heart, but I stay. 679 00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:22,960 And close your mouth, with those teeth you give me anxiety! 680 00:57:24,400 --> 00:57:27,400 Marta, I'll get the jeep and come back. 681 00:57:27,480 --> 00:57:29,360 - Hello, Proietti. - HI. 682 00:57:29,520 --> 00:57:32,320 - Problems with your wife? - I have certain... - Cocks? 683 00:57:32,400 --> 00:57:34,760 - How do you know? - I imagined. 684 00:57:34,960 --> 00:57:39,480 I owe you $1,000. If you give me some another 699,000, let's make a round figure. 685 00:57:39,680 --> 00:57:42,280 But you're crazy! 686 00:57:42,480 --> 00:57:45,600 - Yes, I'm crazy! I'm ruined! - But what does he do? 687 00:57:45,800 --> 00:57:49,760 - Give me this loan! - You don't ask that way. 688 00:57:49,840 --> 00:57:51,960 - Give it to me! - Well... 689 00:57:52,320 --> 00:57:57,160 - He was being very difficult and then he goes with that toilet? - Still! 690 00:57:57,680 --> 00:58:02,320 [in chorus] But go and get it in the ass! When it's needed, it's needed. 691 00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:07,680 In short, to cancel my debt he wants to sleep with Kelly. 692 00:58:09,280 --> 00:58:12,720 - And what does your wife say? - You don't know anything. 693 00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:15,360 - It's hard to say. - Yes! 694 00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:18,840 - Say something to your wife it's very difficult. - Yes. 695 00:58:19,160 --> 00:58:22,000 - Well, goodbye. - No, where are you going? 696 00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:25,120 Think about the scene. You are me. 697 00:58:25,320 --> 00:58:28,440 - No, I'm not capable. - Let's give it a try. 698 00:58:28,640 --> 00:58:33,120 You are me and I am my wife. What can you tell me? 699 00:58:34,080 --> 00:58:36,680 - Well... hi. - [in female voice] Hello. 700 00:58:36,760 --> 00:58:39,360 I do my wife. 701 00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:43,680 - Did you sleep well? - What a drag, get to the point! 702 00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:46,800 You should get fucked by Paolone. 703 00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:51,320 Are you stupid? If I tell her that, she'll slap me! 704 00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:56,200 - Too brutal! Start again. - You hurt me! 705 00:58:56,440 --> 00:58:59,600 - I'm in crazy pain! - Start again. 706 00:58:59,840 --> 00:59:04,800 - Help me. - Okay, I'll try again. - What can you tell me? 707 00:59:06,840 --> 00:59:12,240 - Close your eyes, love. - Good, that's better. 708 00:59:13,920 --> 00:59:17,800 Listen, love, do you remember Paolone... 709 00:59:17,880 --> 00:59:22,160 - Paolone? - You made an impression on him. 710 00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:25,080 - But go! - Very. 711 00:59:25,440 --> 00:59:28,960 This is so true who would like to give you a little gift... 712 00:59:29,160 --> 00:59:32,320 - He would like to give you a gift one billion and 200. - How much? 713 00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:35,880 Repeat the figure, enunciating. How much? 714 00:59:36,280 --> 00:59:39,160 He would like to give you a gift one billion and 200 million. 715 00:59:39,240 --> 00:59:43,080 Are you giving me a gift? To me? And why? 716 00:59:43,160 --> 00:59:45,960 - Why? - Why would he want you... 717 00:59:46,040 --> 00:59:50,320 - Would you like me? - Would he like to fuck you... - Fuck...? 718 00:59:50,520 --> 00:59:52,520 Escort? 719 00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:58,120 Proietti, I'm pissed off! You have to tell him anyway. 720 00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:01,440 - You have to say "fuck". - Pig! 721 01:00:01,640 --> 01:00:04,720 You can't expect something like that! 722 01:00:05,000 --> 01:00:08,000 Projects, go take it in the ass! 723 01:00:08,200 --> 01:00:12,200 - I bust my balls! - Colombo, where are you going? 724 01:00:12,280 --> 01:00:15,720 You all busted my balls! 725 01:00:16,440 --> 01:00:20,760 You leave me with the storm in my skull, like Hamlet? 726 01:00:20,960 --> 01:00:25,160 To fuck or not to fuck, that's the problem. 727 01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:32,000 How hard it is to be a man. 728 01:00:35,920 --> 01:00:38,880 Keep $20, the rest is tip. 729 01:00:39,080 --> 01:00:45,160 Luckily the jeep is still there, so I'll go get Marta. 730 01:00:47,920 --> 01:00:51,040 Holy shit, he took the keys away. 731 01:00:52,640 --> 01:00:54,560 Mister Roger... 732 01:00:54,680 --> 01:00:59,200 Go away, thief! Don't let me see you again! 733 01:00:59,400 --> 01:01:02,000 Give me the keys. 734 01:01:03,120 --> 01:01:07,080 Ugly drunkard, take your hands off me! 735 01:01:07,240 --> 01:01:12,200 - Get lost or I'll call the police! - No, not in the car! 736 01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:16,040 - Don't get involved. - I have to take my daughter to Luke. 737 01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:21,280 Take this thief away too, it was emptying my wallet. 738 01:01:24,160 --> 01:01:27,000 But you can't see anything. 739 01:01:27,080 --> 01:01:28,880 Miracle! 740 01:01:29,240 --> 01:01:32,760 Where are you going? Wait! 741 01:01:32,960 --> 01:01:36,080 I have to go get my daughter! 742 01:01:36,280 --> 01:01:39,320 Now I'll show you. 743 01:01:40,600 --> 01:01:42,440 Go! 744 01:01:44,360 --> 01:01:46,960 Terminator arrives! 745 01:02:36,880 --> 01:02:40,120 Did my father call? I've been waiting for two hours. 746 01:02:40,320 --> 01:02:42,920 I don't dislike it. 747 01:02:44,360 --> 01:02:46,880 It was all lies. 748 01:02:59,040 --> 01:03:02,920 How cold, My heels froze. 749 01:03:05,880 --> 01:03:07,880 Here you go! 750 01:03:08,080 --> 01:03:11,280 The keys are missing again! 751 01:03:11,600 --> 01:03:14,400 Jane, where are you? 752 01:03:14,760 --> 01:03:18,440 I'm Lorenzo, I came to get the keys. 753 01:03:18,640 --> 01:03:21,000 Is Jane there? 754 01:03:21,200 --> 01:03:24,120 How they smoke here! 755 01:03:24,640 --> 01:03:26,480 Permit? 756 01:03:26,680 --> 01:03:30,800 You can't see anything, it seems of staying in Milan in the fog. 757 01:03:31,000 --> 01:03:35,720 - Jane! - I'm here, what are you shouting? 758 01:03:35,920 --> 01:03:39,680 - Give me the car keys! - Calm down. 759 01:03:39,880 --> 01:03:43,320 Stay here. Giulia, bring a towel. 760 01:03:43,560 --> 01:03:49,000 But which towel, I have an appointment with my daughter. 761 01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:54,000 I can't... I can stay. 762 01:03:54,240 --> 01:03:57,000 I make myself comfortable. 763 01:03:57,760 --> 01:04:00,880 - Were we talking? - Do you see that? 764 01:04:01,120 --> 01:04:04,560 [Jane] It's Bob, the owner of the magazine "Bunny". 765 01:04:05,080 --> 01:04:08,040 Tonight I am a guest at his villa. 766 01:04:08,360 --> 01:04:11,320 If you want, I'll let you in too. 767 01:04:12,360 --> 01:04:16,280 Bob, I'll give you some advice, be very careful. 768 01:04:16,480 --> 01:04:20,600 - What is it? - I know that one, she's crazy. 769 01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:24,160 Get her away first that he combines one of his own. 770 01:04:24,240 --> 01:04:26,640 Ugh, I'm all sweaty! 771 01:04:26,840 --> 01:04:29,800 Look at the bird... I played a joke on you! 772 01:04:30,240 --> 01:04:31,960 Okay. 773 01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:34,320 Girls, come. 774 01:04:34,520 --> 01:04:37,760 Let's take a swim in the lake, okay? 775 01:04:38,680 --> 01:04:42,720 Let's go for a swim in the lake all naked! 776 01:04:42,960 --> 01:04:46,320 Fantastic! Take off your underwear. 777 01:04:46,520 --> 01:04:49,280 No, the lake is wet. 778 01:04:49,480 --> 01:04:52,240 - Come on! - I do not want. 779 01:04:53,560 --> 01:04:56,760 All right, let's go! 780 01:04:58,360 --> 01:05:00,400 It's done! 781 01:05:01,000 --> 01:05:06,320 - How exciting, I've never done it. - Run, it's beautiful. 782 01:05:06,560 --> 01:05:08,840 How cold my feet are. 783 01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:12,000 - It's freezing. - Let's dive. 784 01:05:12,200 --> 01:05:14,880 One two three! 785 01:05:15,520 --> 01:05:18,200 Come on, come too. 786 01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:21,960 [Lorenzo] How beautiful! Now that's life! 787 01:05:24,360 --> 01:05:28,360 - I saw a hairy mussel! - [engine running] 788 01:05:29,200 --> 01:05:32,480 - Where are they going? - Aren't they coming in? 789 01:05:32,680 --> 01:05:35,920 - You come! - Wait, my bigolo is frozen. 790 01:05:36,160 --> 01:05:40,200 Open up! Where did your friends go? 791 01:05:40,400 --> 01:05:43,400 That Bob is a son of a bitch! 792 01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:48,960 Won't we be on "Seriously"? Leave us out here? Open up! 793 01:05:49,160 --> 01:05:53,520 Let's go by car and turn on the heating. 794 01:05:53,960 --> 01:05:56,560 I start it. 795 01:05:59,600 --> 01:06:02,960 - Give me the keys. - They're attached. 796 01:06:03,040 --> 01:06:05,640 They are not here! 797 01:06:06,160 --> 01:06:10,280 I'm all stuck, I feel like a Maxicono. 798 01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:13,400 My legs became paralyzed. 799 01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:18,080 If we want to survive, we have to do like the Lapps. 800 01:06:18,160 --> 01:06:22,280 - Who? - The Lapps. I saw it in a documentary on TV. 801 01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:26,560 To beat the cold they rub and lick each other. 802 01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:32,160 We can't make raspberries, I prefer cutlets. 803 01:06:32,360 --> 01:06:36,000 - What are you saying? - Lower the seat, let's make love. 804 01:06:36,240 --> 01:06:39,280 - How? - Hurry, put the seat down! 805 01:06:39,480 --> 01:06:43,000 But what do I bring down what if you don't pick me up? 806 01:06:43,200 --> 01:06:46,160 - Come on! - What's wrong with you? 807 01:06:47,200 --> 01:06:49,960 They froze on me, like the medlars. 808 01:06:50,200 --> 01:06:52,040 Come on! 809 01:06:53,560 --> 01:06:56,320 - Concentrate. - I can't do it. 810 01:06:56,520 --> 01:07:01,480 I only see fireplaces, barbecues and polenta that burns my tongue. 811 01:07:03,200 --> 01:07:05,800 - You're a mess. - I know. 812 01:07:06,680 --> 01:07:09,640 Okay, let's try the dear old... 813 01:07:10,960 --> 01:07:13,840 - Found it! - Right now? 814 01:07:15,160 --> 01:07:16,960 Let's go. 815 01:07:17,360 --> 01:07:19,920 I had hoped so. 816 01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:28,960 HI. 817 01:07:29,160 --> 01:07:32,400 HI. It has finally arrived my sister Michelle. 818 01:07:32,600 --> 01:07:35,720 - Is she rich? - But no, sing. 819 01:07:36,120 --> 01:07:39,800 He's doing a show here tonight. Do you want to go? 820 01:07:39,960 --> 01:07:43,280 I have a desire to go to listen to your sister... 821 01:07:43,360 --> 01:07:46,520 - I don't even know her. - You'll see what a surprise. 822 01:07:49,920 --> 01:07:53,320 Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we have a surprise. 823 01:07:53,400 --> 01:07:56,920 An applause for this amazing singer. 824 01:07:57,600 --> 01:08:00,280 The gorgeous Michelle! 825 01:08:14,080 --> 01:08:17,040 - But that's you! - We are twins. 826 01:08:17,520 --> 01:08:21,960 - You are identical! - She's good, huh? 827 01:08:34,000 --> 01:08:36,760 But what is he doing? 828 01:08:52,440 --> 01:08:54,280 How wonderful! 829 01:08:54,480 --> 01:08:57,440 - Your sister isn't a singer, she's... - The slut! 830 01:08:57,680 --> 01:09:02,160 Yes, she's a slut, but it's a wonderful thing! 831 01:09:05,520 --> 01:09:08,200 Remo, what a shame! 832 01:09:08,400 --> 01:09:12,880 Not at all, even in the ass you are two drops of water. 833 01:09:17,360 --> 01:09:20,240 Beautiful of your little brother-in-law! 834 01:09:20,600 --> 01:09:24,160 - I'm leaving! - No, we're staying. 835 01:09:28,080 --> 01:09:30,960 If only dad saw it! 836 01:09:31,480 --> 01:09:36,480 Here, it's money for her. He says he absolutely needs it. 837 01:09:36,760 --> 01:09:40,360 - Give them to her, I don't talk to that one... - Slut! 838 01:09:40,560 --> 01:09:44,160 I'll talk to him, you go to the hotel. And go! 839 01:09:51,760 --> 01:09:55,120 Now I'll do it for you the indecent proposal. 840 01:10:03,840 --> 01:10:06,040 What should I do? 841 01:10:06,240 --> 01:10:10,080 It's very simple. You are intelligent, sensitive... 842 01:10:10,280 --> 01:10:15,240 Paolone expressed his desire to be your sister. 843 01:10:15,600 --> 01:10:18,600 If you go there, he won't notice. 844 01:10:18,680 --> 01:10:21,520 Look, I don't have many principles, 845 01:10:21,960 --> 01:10:26,480 but in bed with a man I only go there... for money. 846 01:10:27,160 --> 01:10:31,680 In fact, I had guessed it. It's $2,000. 847 01:10:32,360 --> 01:10:37,480 Hey! For $2,000 I do it all throughout the weekend. 848 01:10:38,160 --> 01:10:41,480 He's old, one night is enough. 849 01:10:41,880 --> 01:10:44,680 I'll kill him. 850 01:10:46,160 --> 01:10:48,000 Let's hope. 851 01:10:48,800 --> 01:10:50,920 You are as you are to my Kelly. 852 01:10:51,000 --> 01:10:53,080 - Hey! - Excuse me. 853 01:10:59,000 --> 01:11:02,720 - So, when do we schedule the meeting? - So you accept? 854 01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:05,760 - But have you told her what to do? - All. 855 01:11:06,000 --> 01:11:08,840 - And her? - There is. 856 01:11:08,920 --> 01:11:12,120 Don't jump for joy, but paraphrasing Montanelli: 857 01:11:12,200 --> 01:11:14,880 "He holds his nose and takes the purge." 858 01:11:15,080 --> 01:11:18,280 - Well, let's go. - Where? - Here. 859 01:11:19,360 --> 01:11:21,960 - Shall I put myself here? - Here. 860 01:11:22,040 --> 01:11:25,000 - Sign here. - What is it? 861 01:11:25,320 --> 01:11:29,560 I prepared the contracts. One is signed by me. 862 01:11:29,760 --> 01:11:34,360 - How about a trade-in? - Better to put everything in writing. 863 01:11:34,560 --> 01:11:38,000 For a fuck with my wife you put everything. 864 01:11:38,080 --> 01:11:41,880 - Clauses, paragraphs, penalties... - I did things right. 865 01:11:42,200 --> 01:11:45,680 For me this is kind of compensation for damages... 866 01:11:45,880 --> 01:11:49,240 ...for all the money that you cheated me in life. 867 01:11:49,440 --> 01:11:52,720 - It's not "one and done". - What should he do? 868 01:11:52,800 --> 01:11:55,560 - Read clause B. - "Clause B." 869 01:11:56,360 --> 01:12:00,240 "Above, below, sideways, to the sheep..." 870 01:12:00,320 --> 01:12:02,400 It can be done. 871 01:12:02,880 --> 01:12:05,640 Go to clause C. 872 01:12:06,200 --> 01:12:09,240 The wheelbarrow? Damn, you're exaggerating! 873 01:12:09,320 --> 01:12:14,040 Without clause C I don't cancel the debt. 874 01:12:14,240 --> 01:12:19,000 - I'll tell you to make an effort. - Clause D remains. 875 01:12:20,520 --> 01:12:23,880 - But this isn't even in porn films! - It's essential. 876 01:12:24,120 --> 01:12:26,480 - The cucumber? - Cucumber. 877 01:12:26,680 --> 01:12:29,960 Essential? My wife is not a greengrocer. 878 01:12:30,040 --> 01:12:33,200 And then when you get to clause D, you're exhausted. 879 01:12:33,400 --> 01:12:36,800 Don't worry, I take ginseng. 880 01:12:37,000 --> 01:12:40,960 - More than ginseng, take a jack. - So, are you signing or not? 881 01:12:41,160 --> 01:12:46,120 - With a smile on his lips. - Are you sure your wife accepts? 882 01:12:46,200 --> 01:12:50,560 This contract is for her it's a health walk. 883 01:12:51,520 --> 01:12:56,040 Know that my wife will do everything, but you disgust her. 884 01:12:56,160 --> 01:12:59,840 You say? In my opinion you disgust her more. 885 01:13:00,600 --> 01:13:03,440 Don't rage too much. 886 01:13:03,520 --> 01:13:07,760 I find myself at this juncture and she helps her partner. 887 01:13:07,840 --> 01:13:11,000 - Shall I make you come at eight? - Very good. 888 01:13:11,400 --> 01:13:13,080 - Paolone. - Yes? 889 01:13:13,480 --> 01:13:18,560 - One detail. Brush your teeth, that makes your breath stink! - Yes. 890 01:13:24,600 --> 01:13:27,760 - Permission. - Ok, I'm waiting for news. 891 01:13:27,960 --> 01:13:33,520 - What is it? - They reported Michelle for obscene acts in a public place. 892 01:13:33,720 --> 01:13:37,240 - Get your hands off me! - Walk. 893 01:13:38,080 --> 01:13:40,160 Move. 894 01:13:40,360 --> 01:13:43,320 - Leave me! - Get in the car. 895 01:13:48,080 --> 01:13:50,600 [mermaid] 896 01:13:52,400 --> 01:13:55,200 - Where are they taking her? - In Michigan. 897 01:13:55,280 --> 01:13:58,960 Judge Jones expelled her from Colorado. 898 01:13:59,040 --> 01:14:02,080 And now I have the cucumber again... 899 01:14:02,680 --> 01:14:05,800 Where do I put it? And no... 900 01:14:18,200 --> 01:14:22,960 - What is my birthday? - I have great news to tell you. 901 01:14:23,040 --> 01:14:26,400 - Is Paolone dead? - No, what does Paolone have to do with it! 902 01:14:26,520 --> 01:14:32,400 So it's not wonderful news. Now let me sleep, I'm upset. 903 01:15:04,760 --> 01:15:08,920 - Where are you staying? - At the Ritz hotel... 904 01:15:09,000 --> 01:15:13,240 I can't say it well, I'm cold. At the Ritz-Carlton, first category. 905 01:15:13,320 --> 01:15:17,520 - Well, let's go there. - Are you crazy? There's my daughter! 906 01:15:17,720 --> 01:15:22,800 - We need to find some clothes. - I know who gives us the clothes. 907 01:15:23,120 --> 01:15:28,280 - Near here is the Satanic Sect. - Where do they make human sacrifices? 908 01:15:28,360 --> 01:15:31,440 Yes, but just indulge them. 909 01:15:32,480 --> 01:15:38,880 Good luck knowing that right here there is the Sect of Satan. 910 01:15:45,080 --> 01:15:50,080 - What happens? - Maybe we made a hole, look outside. 911 01:15:50,520 --> 01:15:54,320 - It must be the rubber. - Everything seems fine to me... 912 01:15:54,560 --> 01:15:56,440 Aah! 913 01:15:57,240 --> 01:16:00,240 Wretch, come back! 914 01:16:02,320 --> 01:16:05,040 The troubles are over. 915 01:16:05,600 --> 01:16:10,600 Holy cow, what a night! I hit the police! 916 01:16:11,160 --> 01:16:14,840 Get out of the car with hands on head. 917 01:16:16,400 --> 01:16:19,600 - As? - I said come down! 918 01:16:19,800 --> 01:16:23,000 You know, the airbag is open so... 919 01:16:24,040 --> 01:16:26,840 - But you are naked! - I? 920 01:16:27,040 --> 01:16:31,000 Yes, but I can explain everything to you, a mess happened... 921 01:16:31,080 --> 01:16:35,680 Turn around and put your hands on the roof of the car. 922 01:16:36,000 --> 01:16:39,520 Turned. As you can see, my gun is unloaded. 923 01:16:39,720 --> 01:16:42,480 Spread your legs. 924 01:16:42,680 --> 01:16:44,440 Ouch! 925 01:16:44,520 --> 01:16:48,480 The "browns" no, I just left from a thermal problem! 926 01:16:48,560 --> 01:16:52,640 - What do you want from me? - The arrest, then the judge will decide. 927 01:16:53,960 --> 01:16:58,640 - Get in the car. - Wait a minute, I have to get dressed. 928 01:17:02,440 --> 01:17:05,400 - Get in the car. - That? - Yes. 929 01:17:05,480 --> 01:17:07,400 Can't we use this? 930 01:17:08,840 --> 01:17:12,000 - After you! - Permit. 931 01:17:12,520 --> 01:17:14,400 Thank you. 932 01:17:14,480 --> 01:17:17,160 - Force! - You take! 933 01:17:23,560 --> 01:17:25,720 What a pain! 934 01:17:27,280 --> 01:17:30,480 - The door of salvation! - Stopped! 935 01:17:30,560 --> 01:17:33,840 - Don't look at my butt! - Stop or I'll shoot! 936 01:17:34,240 --> 01:17:37,560 And now take me, "big ass"! 937 01:17:39,360 --> 01:17:42,120 I'm safe! 938 01:17:42,200 --> 01:17:44,560 Save, save... 939 01:17:47,040 --> 01:17:50,160 [Lorenzo] A fagot, a fagot, a fagot, 940 01:17:50,240 --> 01:17:54,440 a fagot, a fagot, a fagot... all fagots! 941 01:17:54,680 --> 01:17:58,960 But where did I end up, at the Village People's house? 942 01:18:09,080 --> 01:18:11,000 Do you dance? 943 01:18:11,080 --> 01:18:13,120 [tango] 944 01:18:14,120 --> 01:18:18,680 - My name is Adam. - Yes, and me Eva! But I'm already married. 945 01:18:18,920 --> 01:18:23,480 - I like your dress. - Yes, it's comfortable. 946 01:18:23,720 --> 01:18:26,360 A leather dress which costs nothing. 947 01:18:26,440 --> 01:18:30,960 - Now come with me, pig! - He's tearing my dress! 948 01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:38,080 I slept 12 hours. 949 01:18:39,640 --> 01:18:42,680 Damn, Paolone has been waiting for an hour already! 950 01:18:42,760 --> 01:18:45,520 Now what do I tell him? 951 01:18:56,160 --> 01:18:59,440 [Kelly] "Now I understand why do you have thoughts, scoundrel! 952 01:18:59,800 --> 01:19:03,040 How could I believe what would you change? 953 01:19:03,320 --> 01:19:07,000 This time I won't forgive you, everything is over... 954 01:19:07,320 --> 01:19:12,560 ...and since you pity me, I'll give you one last gift. 955 01:19:13,080 --> 01:19:18,480 To save you I will pay your debt. You disgust me! Goodbye." 956 01:19:26,080 --> 01:19:30,040 - Thank you for everything, ma'am. - Don't thank me. 957 01:19:30,120 --> 01:19:34,080 Thank that wretch of my ex-husband. 958 01:19:34,160 --> 01:19:36,680 - Did the taxi call me? - Yes. 959 01:19:36,760 --> 01:19:40,720 - Goodbye. - Goodbye, and don't worry. 960 01:19:41,040 --> 01:19:45,520 - It was to teach Remo a lesson. - Don't mention him again! 961 01:19:56,560 --> 01:19:59,680 Kelly! Where are you? 962 01:20:05,760 --> 01:20:08,280 Kelly! 963 01:20:09,480 --> 01:20:12,000 - Kelly! - Remo, what are you doing? 964 01:20:12,080 --> 01:20:14,960 - Where is my wife? - Calm down. 965 01:20:15,280 --> 01:20:16,480 The contract is cancelled! 966 01:20:16,560 --> 01:20:19,520 Send me to jail, but don't touch my wife! 967 01:20:19,600 --> 01:20:22,200 - How? - Nothing can be done anymore! 968 01:20:22,280 --> 01:20:26,080 I love her, I'm not sending her to bed with you not even dead! 969 01:20:26,520 --> 01:20:29,600 - Where? - She left. 970 01:20:32,040 --> 01:20:34,960 - How do you go? - He paid the debt... 971 01:20:35,680 --> 01:20:37,960 ...and she left. 972 01:20:38,080 --> 01:20:41,960 Oh God, he made the wheelbarrow! I feel bad. 973 01:20:42,320 --> 01:20:45,320 But if you love her, why did you accept my proposal? 974 01:20:45,400 --> 01:20:50,760 His twin was supposed to come, not I made you play cucumber with Kelly. 975 01:20:50,840 --> 01:20:53,360 With your sister-in-law yes? 976 01:20:53,560 --> 01:20:58,120 She would have laughed as well if, instead of the cucumber, there was a loaf of bread. 977 01:20:58,200 --> 01:21:00,160 Introduce her to me! 978 01:21:01,480 --> 01:21:05,600 Oh God, I feel faint... Missing! 979 01:21:05,800 --> 01:21:07,880 Breathe. 980 01:21:08,080 --> 01:21:11,840 - What will it be? - It will be the high ground again. 981 01:21:11,920 --> 01:21:15,440 - The high ground? - Drink, it raises your blood pressure. 982 01:21:17,920 --> 01:21:21,960 - Are you feeling better? - Do I feel better? 983 01:21:22,160 --> 01:21:25,200 Yes, I feel much better. 984 01:21:32,360 --> 01:21:35,440 Next time behave like a family man. 985 01:21:35,520 --> 01:21:40,640 It's not my fault. She's the crazy one that got me in trouble. 986 01:21:40,760 --> 01:21:44,120 - Ok, have a good holiday. - Thank you. 987 01:21:45,160 --> 01:21:48,120 Hi, little one. Thanks for coming. 988 01:21:48,200 --> 01:21:52,160 Don't call me little girl! And then the little one is you. 989 01:21:52,240 --> 01:21:57,320 Why? It's that girl's fault who took Dylan's car. 990 01:21:57,520 --> 01:22:02,680 - Still? Stop it! - Stop what? Speak slowly. 991 01:22:02,920 --> 01:22:06,880 I scream as much as I want! You're only telling me lies. 992 01:22:06,960 --> 01:22:10,360 The photo with dedication, Dylan's car... But why? 993 01:22:10,440 --> 01:22:14,400 - It's all true. - Nothing is true! 994 01:22:15,040 --> 01:22:18,960 My dreams will be when I was little, but have you ever wondered... 995 01:22:19,080 --> 01:22:22,920 ...because millions of girls like me decide to dream? 996 01:22:23,280 --> 01:22:26,080 - Because he's missing something. - Martha! 997 01:22:28,360 --> 01:22:31,200 And very often it is the father. 998 01:22:35,760 --> 01:22:37,120 Martha! 999 01:22:38,680 --> 01:22:41,200 - And get up! - Martha! 1000 01:22:41,280 --> 01:22:47,040 - Lorenzo, I only found out now. - I've made a lot of trouble. 1001 01:22:47,120 --> 01:22:50,960 - But the jeep is safe. - I know that crazy girl got you into trouble. 1002 01:22:51,320 --> 01:22:53,920 She's really crazy! 1003 01:22:54,000 --> 01:22:57,040 He made me go downhill with a toilet, 1004 01:22:57,240 --> 01:23:02,120 I ended up on a tree, a rocket hit my head, 1005 01:23:02,440 --> 01:23:05,960 then I walked around naked, they wanted to arrest me, 1006 01:23:06,040 --> 01:23:09,120 and I ended up among the bottoms. 1007 01:23:10,200 --> 01:23:14,160 The worst thing is that I lost friendship with my daughter. 1008 01:23:14,960 --> 01:23:19,240 It's my fault too that I foisted that wretch on you. 1009 01:23:19,480 --> 01:23:24,920 - It does not matter. - Wait, I would like to do something for you. 1010 01:23:25,000 --> 01:23:26,840 No, no... 1011 01:23:30,600 --> 01:23:33,560 Maybe you could do one thing. 1012 01:23:46,600 --> 01:23:49,800 How could you go to bed with him? 1013 01:23:50,000 --> 01:23:53,680 And how could you accept that proposal? 1014 01:23:53,880 --> 01:23:57,920 - It's a long story. - I, on the other hand, was very fast. 1015 01:23:58,120 --> 01:24:02,400 - It took two minutes to remove my tooth. - Whale! 1016 01:24:02,600 --> 01:24:05,800 What was I supposed to do? I paid and off I went. 1017 01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:08,800 But there were a lot of stipulations! 1018 01:24:09,600 --> 01:24:12,160 But he was happy. 1019 01:24:12,240 --> 01:24:15,480 We also missed him getting pissed off. 1020 01:24:17,800 --> 01:24:21,040 When he saw the check, he almost fainted. 1021 01:24:21,840 --> 01:24:25,080 - Which check? - What I did to him. 1022 01:24:25,160 --> 01:24:28,000 One billion and 200 million. 1023 01:24:28,800 --> 01:24:33,560 - A check? And with what money? - With yours. 1024 01:24:35,600 --> 01:24:37,600 Mine? 1025 01:24:40,640 --> 01:24:43,160 Yes, this telegram has arrived from Kenya. 1026 01:24:43,240 --> 01:24:47,600 I wanted to read it, but you didn't want to listen to me. 1027 01:24:48,440 --> 01:24:53,560 "We won the New Year's Lottery with ticket purchased at the airport. 1028 01:24:53,760 --> 01:24:56,920 "Your share is 1,200,000. 1029 01:24:57,120 --> 01:24:59,920 "Wonderful life, long live Italy! 1030 01:25:00,000 --> 01:25:02,880 "Signed Giulio and friends." 1031 01:25:03,720 --> 01:25:07,640 - Is this a joke? - No, it's all true! 1032 01:25:09,200 --> 01:25:11,480 [verses] 1033 01:25:11,680 --> 01:25:15,800 And go! Then you really paid for it! 1034 01:25:16,040 --> 01:25:19,640 - Didn't you go with that pig? - No. 1035 01:25:24,720 --> 01:25:27,920 - This is for playing. - I was unlucky. 1036 01:25:28,280 --> 01:25:32,200 This is for the contract and this for the cucumber. 1037 01:25:32,280 --> 01:25:35,120 But I wanted to send your sister there. 1038 01:25:35,200 --> 01:25:37,120 The tree! 1039 01:25:37,680 --> 01:25:40,800 Honey, I'm sorry. 1040 01:25:42,760 --> 01:25:44,560 Love... 1041 01:25:45,320 --> 01:25:50,800 - He won't play again, I swear. - Don't swear, it'll bring you bad luck. 1042 01:25:57,040 --> 01:26:00,080 Let's go to the room, I am full of love. 1043 01:26:00,160 --> 01:26:03,000 Didn't you say it's too high here? 1044 01:26:03,160 --> 01:26:07,120 I'm like Moser in Mexico City, I break the high altitude record. 1045 01:26:21,160 --> 01:26:25,440 So we're leaving tomorrow, the holiday is over. 1046 01:26:27,360 --> 01:26:31,920 But tell me, you had a good time together with your dad? 1047 01:26:32,760 --> 01:26:36,600 It was the holidays most disgusting of my life... 1048 01:26:36,680 --> 01:26:39,040 ...and the last ones I spend with you. 1049 01:26:40,560 --> 01:26:45,360 - What a bad temper. - Better than yours! 1050 01:26:45,440 --> 01:26:51,040 Is this thanksgiving? Cheers and see you next year. 1051 01:27:16,800 --> 01:27:19,920 Hello, Lorenzo. How are you? 1052 01:27:21,360 --> 01:27:24,560 Hello, Luke. Do you want to drink something? 1053 01:27:25,080 --> 01:27:28,160 I came to say hello. 1054 01:27:28,360 --> 01:27:32,240 Thank you, and you will come to Ponte di Legno next year? 1055 01:27:32,320 --> 01:27:38,480 - I don't know if I can. - As my daughter says: "Yes, it can be done." 1056 01:27:39,120 --> 01:27:43,640 Ah, this is your daughter? Congratulations, it's beautiful. 1057 01:27:46,040 --> 01:27:51,960 - What do you call it? Little one? - Don't call her that or she'll get angry. 1058 01:27:54,640 --> 01:27:58,000 Mr. Perry, "little" is fine. 1059 01:27:58,320 --> 01:28:01,760 - Do you want to dance? - With her? 1060 01:28:02,320 --> 01:28:04,280 I can? 1061 01:28:05,840 --> 01:28:09,840 - I can? - You have to, otherwise I'll rip your nose off! 1062 01:28:14,080 --> 01:28:15,920 Let's go. 1063 01:28:41,240 --> 01:28:44,080 I was good. Thank you. Please. 1064 01:28:44,760 --> 01:28:47,400 [inaudible] 1065 01:29:09,120 --> 01:29:14,080 - That's my little girl. - And he makes her dance like that? Shame on you! 1066 01:29:14,160 --> 01:29:16,720 It's a little girl! 1067 01:29:26,000 --> 01:29:30,160 Luke, you said that you were doing a ballet... 1068 01:29:31,000 --> 01:29:33,760 [inaudible] 1069 01:29:37,360 --> 01:29:39,800 Where are you going? 1070 01:29:41,160 --> 01:29:43,920 Son of a whore! 1071 01:29:44,040 --> 01:29:46,200 Luke! Martha! 1072 01:29:46,720 --> 01:29:50,920 Luke, she's not one of 9,999,999! 1073 01:29:51,000 --> 01:29:53,800 Where are you going? Wait for me! 1074 01:29:53,880 --> 01:29:56,640 They go up! 1075 01:30:15,680 --> 01:30:20,280 - How did they come? - Fabulous, my friends will faint. 1076 01:30:20,880 --> 01:30:26,600 I can tell my friends a few lies about us two? 1077 01:30:26,920 --> 01:30:31,520 Sure, but leave it let me give you some advice... exaggerate! 1078 01:30:33,920 --> 01:30:37,720 Now let's go, Lorenzo will be worried. Your father is nice. 1079 01:30:37,920 --> 01:30:40,680 It's the best in the world! 1080 01:30:59,280 --> 01:31:03,680 It's over! I swear never again. 1081 01:31:03,880 --> 01:31:06,280 Finally back home! 1082 01:31:24,000 --> 01:31:26,040 Love. 1083 01:31:26,600 --> 01:31:28,640 And that's it! 1084 01:31:29,040 --> 01:31:33,560 - It's over! - Give me one last chance. 1085 01:31:33,640 --> 01:31:37,000 - I swear to you that... - You already swore 6 months ago in Aspen. 1086 01:31:37,720 --> 01:31:42,000 But then you bet the house on a stupid horse! 1087 01:31:42,080 --> 01:31:44,680 Stupid… he was at two fifths. 1088 01:31:45,040 --> 01:31:49,440 - [speaks in a foreign language] - But this old woman is stalking me! 1089 01:31:49,520 --> 01:31:54,280 Where are you hanging out? It's July, the Befana is January 6th! 1090 01:31:55,760 --> 01:31:58,320 How hot! 1091 01:31:58,400 --> 01:32:01,880 Projectiles! Are you also on holiday in America? 1092 01:32:01,960 --> 01:32:05,960 - No, I'm chasing my wife. I have certain... - Fucks. Always those! 1093 01:32:06,280 --> 01:32:11,320 - Women don't change. - My little girl has changed. 1094 01:32:11,520 --> 01:32:18,400 Now let's go to America to study, he no longer has strange ideas in his head. 1095 01:32:51,000 --> 01:32:55,400 - Hi, Kelly! - Hello, little one! 1096 01:32:57,400 --> 01:33:00,440 We are free! 1097 01:33:00,840 --> 01:33:04,640 Look, why don't we go to Rio? 1098 01:33:04,720 --> 01:33:08,160 I know some Brazilians who do samba. 1099 01:33:09,800 --> 01:33:13,200 But what do you do? What a bad habit! I'll knock your balls off! 1100 01:33:13,280 --> 01:33:16,080 No, you'll thin it out for me!